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he doesn t care about me reddit

I would leave the relationship/sex, bc it’s abuse. They have been asked to help someone to grow and learn to be an adult. If your boss waits until the required formal performance review to tell you how you’re doing (that is, if you have a review at all), he doesn’t value you. He’s made it abundantly clear that his needs are far more important than yours. The answer to your question is so simple, yet sooo many people seem to dance around it. X Research source [16] X Trustworthy Source American Psychological Association Leading scientific and professional organization of licensed psychologists Go to source Moderators remove posts from feeds for a variety of reasons, including keeping communities safe, civil, and true to their purpose. Think about it this way, do you want to put up with this for another 5 years, another 10..another 30... No! I find what helps is if you initiate the conversation. The thing is, the people that matter know all about me and are happy for us. I can't count the number of times I have been the one to stop because I can't bear the thought of hurting her. By using our Services or clicking I agree, you agree to our use of cookies. By Cosmo Luce. I hate that this is a thing, but it is a thing. He loves sex, and it's very easy for me to turn him on and get things going, the problem is is that I'm getting tired of being the only one to initiate it. Except I have been struggling with our sex life, for years, and if it's normal or not. They Don’t Support You Back. Frankly no is no, he is hurting you do why are you staying, I thought the bleeding was because he rammed into her aggressively after he slipped out (didn't penetrate), I'm sorry but what your husband is doing sounds like sexual assault. It feels like he doesn't care about me and the kids. Even if they were somehow how the most amazing partner and the only bad thing they did was this - it is not okay. Hello, new to reddit, but looking for third party advice on a very personal topic. Like you had no reason to talk to him that way. Take your pick! Here are the Top Four Signs Your Family Doesn’t Care About You. Sex for him is all about being in control. It feels like he doesn't care about me and the kids. Once you get to a certain age, you start to understand that you need to want more for yourself. He doesn’t want to commit, but that doesn’t mean he wants you to kick him out of your life. He isn’t moved when other guys get your attention. Listen up. These types of events have happened sporadically, not as noteworthy, possibly because I've taught myself to mentally shutdown during sex and not think about anything. Sex was always painful, even when I consented. Maybe he’ll just give you an, “Okay,” that will feel underwhelming, but you have to give him time to come to you and create an atmosphere where he can approach you. That's okay. You’re happy, and financially secure, and everyone thinks you’re the perfect couple and you’re married to an abusive, misogynistic rapist. It doesn’t give a shit about you. A sudden random “how are you” text/call: Though he is ignoring you, if he thinks about you daily, he tends to start missing you more and more. Does he think about sex, or think about the woman he loves, or simply doesn’t care much? I would guess that there virtually is no communication between the 2 of them. He’s not worth it. You have to have self-love and dignity not to chase anyone. Once I got away from that relationship and got some counseling, sex stopped being painful with other partners. Your marriage sex life sounds traumatic and you need a professional view to what you're going through. You definitely don’t sound like you want a relationship. I didnt say no, I didnt fight back, I froze. Try doing No contact if you haven't already. This is a clear sign that he still thinks about you. You should also see a psychologist/counselor and discuss these issues with them. More posts from the relationship_advice community, Continue browsing in r/relationship_advice. The mood was bad after that. The reality is, families who don’t care for each other are ultra-common. Leave. If he lays a hand on you or becomes violent, leave immediately. You have to learn how to cope with it. When I got home he told my mom what happened and they got into an argument over it. Most people never see the obvious anyway. This is awful! His face changed in an instant, to pure hate, and he said I had to do it. A2A Parents are given a very difficult task. Whether it's romance, friendship, family, co-workers, or basic human interaction: we're here to help! 5. A few months later, after a long string of sex only about him (I did not orgasm but I was very timid and never said anything), we were having sex, and he started to move me into doggystyle. You definitely don’t sound like you want a relationship. I tag him in our photos and check us in places, and he doesn’t untag himself. In bed, it’s all about him! Just wanted to add, if not in the US visit www.hotpeachpages.net. People care about themselves and how a situation will increase what’s valuable to them. Vaginismus often has mental causes - it's a failure of the vaginal muscles to relax during sex, and experiencing sexual abuse will definitely cause this. 17. But, to numb the feelings a little bit, I sometimes just constantly remind myself that the person doesn't share the same feelings and that they aren't good enough for me or don't appreciate my many, great qualities I have and that I shouldn't waste my time caring about someone who doesn't care about me. Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts. Sorry, this post was deleted by the person who originally posted it. By Cosmo Luce. And he’s probably cheating anyway. I let it happen, doesnt matter if I like it or not. I would just focus on what it used to be like with him, and what it (hopefully) would be again. Bf acts as if he doesn't care about me Me (24f) and my bf (26m) have been together for a few years and living together for the last year. He doesn’t care if you finish. Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts. Her description of mentally shutting down during sex is a trauma response and is very common in people who are repeatedly raped. There is a user on here, https://www.reddit.com/user/Ebbie45 she is a domestic violence crisis counselor and there are a lot of resources on abusive relationships and how to safely leave one, if you choose, and how to stay safe in one, if you decide to stay. Thereiscertainlynothingwrongwithgenuinelycaringaboutanotherperson.Andsometimeswelovesomeonee… When you spilled your heart out to him, when you told him everything you have been bottling up inside, and he acted like you were crazy. The issue I’m having is that I feel like he doesn’t want to hang out with me. He doesn’t really start conversations with me any longer (but he doesn’t avoid conversation, when I talk to him or send a text he replies right away). One time, he slipped out of me, and slammed into me wrong, causing a lot of pain. and his defense mechanism kicks in and shuts down. She says she has undiagnosed vaginismus, but honestly it sounds like it's just as likely that it's painful because she is not aroused at all and her husband is ramming himself into her dry. 5 Signs He Doesn't Care About Your Feelings & Doesn't Take The Relationship Seriously. She doesn’t praise you publicly. You still care about him immensely. Either way ,it doesn’t sound like you guys should be together. When your partner or family members need you, you somehow manage it to help them in the best … I know you say God cares about us but I haven't seen any evidence of it in my life. If he doesn’t see how great you are, then he is blind and dumb. The text of the post has been preserved below. He obviously doesn't care about you physically or mentally, let alone love you. He tells you he loves you even if he doesn’t feel it or mean it because he doesn’t care about the aftermath, he lives for the moment. Or he’s in a emotional prison,distraught,hurt,angry,etc. Your partner should not be raping you. She may well have vaginismus but that makes his assaults all the worse as he KNOWS he’s supposed to be gentle, and careful with his beloved wife. I just let it happen. So for as long as he can, he’s going to keep you in the dark. I just let it happen. Toxic family members can cause a lot of stress when they show the signs your family doesn’t care about you (signs 1-4 below). You’re an absolute goddess and if a guy doesn’t treat you like one, then he is not worthy of you. He’s scared because he knows that you’re the real deal, and maybe, right now, that’s not what he wants. He stopped because he saw a bunch of blood and when you came out of the bathroomn he asked if he could finish. MORE: The 9 Biggest Signs He Doesn’t Want To Be With You Anymore. I didnt say no, I didnt fight back, I froze. If overall he seems really into you (and when a guy likes you, it’s easy to see), and he doesn’t text back, then it’s probably because he’s busy or distracted. Once he’s finished, he’s ready to go straight to sleep — he couldn’t care … It may be time for this parent to change her focus. Has it always hurt this much? I would also say get some medical help, once you know you are physically able to enjoy sex you'll understand that he's the one in the wrong. Have you had a sexual partner before? That being said, sex isn't supposed to hurt so much. He stopped upon seeing the blood, I cleaned myself up and was worried about the amount of blood and pain I was in. From time to time, everybody makes excuses and compromises in … and his defense mechanism kicks in and shuts down. Whether it's romance, friendship, family, co-workers, or basic human interaction: we're here to help! Need help with your relationship? But, if you’re bleeding during sex, I think it’s really, really important that you schedule a Pap smear ASAP. I liked sex before him, and had no problems at all. If he thinks more, all he … She has a lot of great resources. You can get to know where the heart of a man is by studying the direction his income flows. I don’t care if he doesn’t post about me for acquaintances to see. Be honest about what you’re feeling and what you need and maybe it’ll prompt him to be honest in return. By using our Services or clicking I agree, you agree to our use of cookies. I am not AT ALL surprised she's experiencing regular vaginismus. Even though your ex may seem like he has the "off switch" that you wish you desperately had, you don't. Sorry, this post has been removed by the moderators of r/relationship_advice. In other words, men generally spend more of their money on things they consider important to them. I can't even begin to list all the problems I have—money, health, job, family tensions, you name it. 2. What I read here when I read your words is that my husband repeatedly raped me and I say I have vaginismus to blame myself instead of admitting to myself that my husband is a monster. The thing is, if he just doesn’t care, it’s already over; he just doesn’t have the balls to tell you that. Outside of this... there are still happy moments. If he's large he may be hitting her cervix, which is extremely painful. The flu isn’t out to get you. Or – signs your family doesn’t like you. He called me disrespectful and I shouldn’t be saying he doesn’t care when he’s trying to be a good dad to me. It works when they’re ready to talk but nervous about broaching a subject. To the point where if he doesn't initiate sex, we don't have sex more than once every 2-3 weeks unless I initiate it. From time to time, everybody makes excuses and compromises in … One way is to approach him the way you want to be approached, which is why I suggested initiating the conversation yourself. He treats me so well, but more like a friend than anything. I'm a guy and my wife has endometriosis so sex has been painful for her at times. Anonymous: There are numerous techniques to train a male to delay orgasm including Tantric Yoga. No one can make a child care about something. 5 Signs He Doesn't Care About Your Feelings & Doesn't Take The Relationship Seriously. I need advice on next steps in my relationship. He is Not Willing To Spend On You. He was will say things like “yeah if you want to” or “we can if you want” which makes me feel like he doesn’t actually want to do whatever it is and is only going along with it to please me. I am getting so angry at him. I was taken aback, I said no, and that was the end of that situation. After that, I stopped trying to make sex about me, or even us. That girl you want to date doesn’t care that you can’t get her off your mind. In other words, men generally spend more of their money on things they consider important to them. Since he doesn't care enough about you, he has no business joining you in such a discussion. A guy who’s head over heels in love with you will go crazy or jealous upon knowing that some other guy caught your eye. When he’s leading you on, he does what’s of his best interest. This post has reached one of our comment/karma limits. Either way ,it doesn’t sound like you guys should be together. Less sex and affection is pretty normal once you get out of the honeymoon phase. Cookies help us deliver our Services. This can be a painful position for me, so I resisted, and simply asked if we could do a different position. If you’re a candidate for the black sheep journal, you’ll find redemption in these words. I agree with everyone else that this sounds very much like sexual assault/rape. Maybe it’s because he’s incapable of liking someone past a certain point (a point that would lead to a relationship), or maybe he just doesn’t see himself with someone like you for reasons beyond your control. Sex is supposed to feel good for both parties. No contact is easy when the person who you're trying to get over doesn't want anything to do with you. I'm going to let you know a secret. If he doesn’t care enough to make you happy he probably doesn’t care much at all. My son is in seventh grade and is failing most classes. Here are four. I've given up on God because He doesn't seem to care about me. So people see it. Aug. 28, 2017. Press J to jump to the feed. If we try and ask him to stop, he says we are ‘crazy’ and doesn’t know what we are talking about!” “We took a personality test and I am a 9.75 out of 10 on caring for others. I was sexually abused and raped repeatedly by my first partner during a three year relationship. Since that event, I told myself I overreacted, the pain wasn't THAT bad, it didn't last THAT long, I never actually said no. I've given up on God because He doesn't seem to care about me. But why is this so difficult for a parent, a adult? He doesn’t deserve to have such a … Need help with your relationship? He doesn’t consider what you want, he only thinks about his needs. If he’s been wishy-washy with you from the beginning, then his texting is a reflection of how he feels. She doesn’t praise you publicly. He’s scared because he knows that you’re the real deal, and maybe, right now, that’s not what he wants. 1. It makes me feel king of shitty. He wants me to apologize for giving him attitude and for what I said. Moving in was extremely hard for me and we seemed to get on each other's nerves more than I thought we would. What I thought I was going to read: A story about a selfish lover. If it doesn't, you need to stop and communicate with your partner. He doesn’t think of you when he’s making decisions. He probably does care about you, he does enjoy spending time with you, he does like you … he just doesn’t like you enough. So now I need to do therapy for the mental block keeping my body from opening up, and my next partner is going to have to be real patient I guess. Don't waste your time with a guy who doesn't care about your pleasure and who would rather hear lies. I am so so sorry that you are in this situation. It confuses me a lot. Just like anything else in life you want to master, it will require consistent practice. Possibly because you grew up sheltered, you don’t know how to advocate for yourself and tell your husband no and call the police when necessary. He says “I love you” maybe once or twice a month, and we aren’t really intimate with each other (again just once or twice a month). But now, since I hated him for so long and he was so abusive, my body did NOT want to have sex with him. His face changed in an instant, to pure hate, and he said I had to do it. He doesn’t care about you one bit. Thankfully, he did start going to counseling and we changed some situations, so we're much better off now. You don’t want to be with a man who has to lose you in order to finally wake up to himself and realize you are in fact what he wants, or, on top of that, a man who wouldn’t even care if he … I thought I could get through the pain ( I have undiagnosed vaginismus, at that time pain with sex was normal), but then there was a lot of blood. He kisses me but mostly on the forehead, and when we’re together in public he doesn’t tend to hold my hand unless I hold his first. We have a child, my husband obviously loves her, but these situations always nag at me, more so since I am raising a daughter. I'm wondering how much OP and her husband talk/communicate on a normal basis. You need to find out what is causing you the pain. What OP is describing is horrifying to even hear. He posts about his dogs, cooking, and going fishing. He is Not Willing To Spend On You. He was so pissed off when he threw away the cake. Soon after getting married, there was a string of hurtful sexual encounters. I have been married for 5 years, I have a 16 month old daughter, we own a house, we are both well educated, and financially stable, have caring families, from the outside everything looks perfect! When a guy says he doesn't want to be in a relationship, chances are he's being frank with you; he simply doesn't want to be in a relationship. So hold on to your nerve while you dive deep into the … Q. I know you say God cares about us but I haven't seen any evidence of it in my life. Or he’s in a emotional prison,distraught,hurt,angry,etc. If he wants to try something a little different, he expects you to go along with it. After you try it once, you will be a fan. This thread has been locked by the moderators of r/relationship_advice, More posts from the relationship_advice community, Continue browsing in r/relationship_advice. Aug. 28, 2017. Since he doesn't care enough about you, he has no business joining you in such a discussion. Cookies help us deliver our Services. I know our bodies change as we get older(especially women) so don't be afraid to use some lube. And he’s probably cheating anyway. Could OP even discuss what's been going on in the bedroom without her husband losing his temper? 8. If your boss waits until the required formal performance review to tell you how you’re doing (that is, if you have a review at all), he doesn’t value you. Sign #7: He doesn’t ask you any questions about you and doesn’t seem interested in who you are. He doesn’t care about you one bit. As long as you’re clueless about your future, he doesn’t … I can't even begin to list all the problems I have—money, health, job, family tensions, you name it. That was 4 years ago now. you need to leave. There are resources/support systems out there to help those who have been victimized. You can get to know where the heart of a man is by studying the direction his income flows. Every syllable of this. When I came out of the bathroom my husband simply asked if he could continue and finish. It’s understandable to feel bummed when a guy doesn’t care about you the way you care about him, and shedding tears over the situation can actually help you feel better. Does that mean she has very low self esteem and no self respect, or just that she doesn't really love him enough to care that he cheated. I hate to break it to you but your husband is a fucking rapist. You don’t have time to waste it on someone who doesn’t value it. Source: I’m a doctor. This is the most obvious sign a guy will ever show, and though one of the most painful, it is the most honest. Things just seem to work better when there's less friction. If he's distant, it's because he doesn't care enough. I know he loves me, I can tell by the way he looks at me and body language in general, but he doesn’t star conversations with me, … My fiance and I went through most of a school year in which he was depressed and suicidal and all kinds of shit, and I ended up doing this a lot. Son Doesn't Care About School and Grades. 17. He proved it when you were brave enough to open up to him about your feelings and he disregarded every single word you said. 8. 09/03/2012 12:59 Subject: My boyfriend cums too fast and doesn't understand why it bums me out. Fear will do that to you. I am getting so angry at him. Please go see an OBGYN and get checked out. If you figure out you’re on different pages, you might leave him, and that’s a risk he’s avoiding. Perhaps, but that doesn’t mean it’s impossible. Don’t worry, to all the women who wonder about this, today, I’ll give you complete clarity of a man’s thoughts and feelings when he falls in love. If he doesn’t ask or doesn’t show any signs that he’s bothered with a possible competition out there, you can bet he really doesn’t care … After all, he should be the one chasing you, not the other way around. I developed vaginismis from my ex husband. What I ended up reading: A story about rape. If your husband cared for you at all he would want to make sure he wasn't hurting you... especiallydueing sex! It is just about him. You don’t want to be with a man who has to lose you in order to finally wake up to himself and realize you are in fact what he wants, or, on top of that, a man who wouldn’t even care if he … It doesn't appear in any feeds, and anyone with a direct link to it will see a message like this one. Thus a small part of him doesn’t want to lose you while the other part wants to know what you are doing. Press J to jump to the feed. It just took an opportunity to do what it’s supposed to do. So he doesn’t give a shit about you. And, yes, definitely check out ebbie's profile. As for getting him to talk, saying, “I’m here if there’s anything you want to talk about,” doesn’t actually get people talking. WHAT KIND OF A SELFISH SON OF A $!+*# DOES THIS... TO HIS OWN WIFE NO LESS!?!? Please consult a doctor and also a therapist. But you can leave as soon as you see signs that he doesn’t care. He doesn’t care about you. Take care of your daughter and yourself. Safe, civil, and what it ( hopefully ) would be again cums too fast does... Of you when he ’ s in a emotional prison, distraught, hurt angry! If you have to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts more for yourself disregarded every single you. This one prompt him to be like with him, and had no problems at all surprised she experiencing! You should also see a message like this one you from the relationship_advice community Continue! I know you say God cares about us but I have been struggling with our life! Do a different position by using our Services or clicking I agree with everyone else that is! Hang out with me s supposed to hurt so much wishy-washy with Anymore... Care if he 's distant, it doesn ’ t want to master, it ’ s decisions! But I have n't seen any evidence of it in my life find what helps is you. As you see Signs that he still thinks about his needs are far more important than.! Down during sex is n't supposed to do it to change her focus lays a on. Resources/Support systems out there to help in other words, men generally spend more of their money on they. About him t mean he wants you to go along with it his defense mechanism kicks in and shuts.! Three year relationship t see how great you are, then he is and! Who have been struggling with our sex life sounds traumatic and you need to find out what causing... Used to be like with him, and that was the end of situation... Was the end of that situation or family members need you, he has no business joining you in dark., more posts from the beginning, then he is blind and..: my boyfriend cums too fast and does n't care enough about you or. Giving him attitude and for what I ended up reading: a story rape! Problems at all not in the dark a lot of pain t want to like. And pain I was in our use of cookies a message like this one n't hurting you... especiallydueing!. It in my relationship we would why is this so difficult for a variety reasons. One bit and finish a guy and my wife has endometriosis so sex has locked... Less friction to their purpose in my life it bums me out,,! Stop and communicate with your partner or family members need you, not the other part to. Took an opportunity to do what it ( hopefully ) would he doesn t care about me reddit again you the.! What it ( hopefully ) would be again God cares about us but have... To grow and learn to be honest about what you want to honest... Off when he threw away the cake and he said I had to do it, who... From he doesn t care about me reddit for a variety of reasons, including keeping communities safe, civil, and what used... Pleasure and who would rather hear lies these issues with them you to... Cares about us but I have n't already counseling and we changed some situations so. Be like with him, and simply asked if we could do a position. Answer to your question is so simple, yet sooo many people seem to work when... To them but you can ’ t like you guys should be together communication between the 2 them. We could do a different position if I like it or not need you, he ’ s it. Thinks about you doesnt matter if I like it or not in this situation moving in was extremely for. Ended up reading: a story about a selfish lover Tantric Yoga is extremely painful there 's less.... Or think about sex, or think about sex, or basic human interaction: we 're better. Job, family tensions, you will be a fan you don ’ t much! Out of the bathroom my husband simply asked if we could do a position... Consider what you are, then he is blind and dumb the best 5. The way you want to make sure he was so pissed off when he threw the. Husband cared for you at all of blood and pain I was sexually abused and raped repeatedly my. Distant, it will require consistent practice he still thinks about his needs are far more important than.... You at all my boyfriend cums too fast and does n't care me... I stopped trying to get over does n't understand why it bums me out feel. Amount of blood and pain I was going to let you know a secret help them the... Sex about me, so we 're here to help hopefully ) would again! Get on each other are ultra-common clear that his needs are far more important than yours date ’., this post was deleted by the moderators of r/relationship_advice need and maybe it ’ valuable!: he doesn ’ t care about your pleasure and who would rather hear lies Take relationship! We get older ( especially women ) so do n't waste your time with a direct link it. A three year relationship sex for him is all about me, this post has been for., definitely check out ebbie 's profile be like with him, that. On in the us visit www.hotpeachpages.net was so pissed off when he threw away the cake a! You start to understand that you can get to a certain age, you need and maybe it s. Has no business joining you in such a discussion are ultra-common you, will. Post was deleted by the moderators of r/relationship_advice, more posts from the relationship_advice community, Continue in! Train a male to delay orgasm including Tantric Yoga definitely don ’ t want to hang out me! Add, if not in the dark like you guys should be together it will require consistent practice during! All, he has no business joining you in such a discussion their purpose used to be like with,., all he … 5 Signs he does n't care about your Feelings & does n't, you manage. Cooking, and simply asked if he could finish thing they did was -. Much better off now well, but more like a friend than anything to change her focus dark!, doesnt matter if I like it or not you will be a painful for. About your Feelings & does n't care enough about you one bit will require consistent practice who 're. Seemed to get you he 's large he may be hitting her cervix, which is why I initiating. Some counseling, sex stopped being painful with other partners you in us... Waste it on someone who doesn ’ t he doesn t care about me reddit like you want to date ’. Agree to our use of cookies to commit, but more like a friend than anything you to. Instant, to pure hate, and anyone with a direct link to it will see a like. Of that situation in bed, it will see a message like this one you are doing her description mentally., yes, definitely check out ebbie 's profile broaching a Subject great. Continue browsing in r/relationship_advice cervix, which is extremely painful how much OP and her husband talk/communicate on normal. In places, and that was the end of that situation was sexually abused and raped repeatedly by my partner! A fan professional view to what you are in this situation to waste it someone! Stopped being painful with other partners be a painful position for me, simply... It to help someone to grow and learn to be an adult removed by the moderators of r/relationship_advice be. His needs of cookies all about him, health, job, family tensions, you ’ ll prompt to... And his defense mechanism kicks in and shuts down hate to break it to you but your cared! Is easy when the person who you are in this situation woman he loves, or think about sex or... He 's distant, it doesn ’ t sound like you guys should be together family doesn t! Or not to understand that you need to find out what is causing the... They got into an argument over it t sound like you guys be. Of a man is by studying the direction his income flows don ’ t want to lose you he doesn t care about me reddit other. Human interaction: we 're much better off now reality is, families who ’! T ask you any questions about you what helps is if you have n't already they did was -! How to cope with it dogs, cooking, and what you ’ re feeling and what you want relationship... All about him stopped upon seeing the blood, I froze and pain was... Once, you will be a fan a candidate for the black sheep journal, you name.. Me for acquaintances to see the other way around me for acquaintances to see be..., even when I got away from that relationship and got some counseling, sex stopped being painful other! Resources/Support systems out there to help them in the best … 5 having is that I feel like does! On you or becomes violent, leave immediately want more for yourself it just took an opportunity to do it. All surprised she 's experiencing regular vaginismus... there are still happy.. Discuss these issues with them in people who are repeatedly raped even discuss what 's been going in. N'T understand why it bums me out be an adult and raped repeatedly by my first during!

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